About Your Nervous System and Present Moment Thinking
So... let’s clear something up.
Living in the present moment is not the same thing as regulating your nervous system. If it were, everyone who meditates, breathes, prays, or slows down would feel settled in their body.
They do not.
And this is where people get frustrated and quietly blame themselves.
Because they are “doing the right things,” but nothing sticks.
Here is why.
Most people try to live in the present from their head, not from orientation.
They think presence means staying calm. Or positive. Or grounded. Or peaceful. Or slow.
So they monitor themselves.
Am I present enough? Am I breathing right? Am I calm yet? Why am I still triggered?
That is not presence. That is management.
And the nervous system knows the difference.
A regulated nervous system is not calm. It is accurate. It knows where it is in time. It knows what is actually happening. It knows whether the response matches the moment.
Let me show you what I mean.
Imagine two people sitting quietly in the same room.
One looks calm. Still. Composed. Inside, they are frozen. Holding. Watching. Waiting for something to go wrong.
The other is breathing a little faster. Eyes alert. Body awake.
They are tracking the room. Responding to what is real. Not bracing.
Which one is regulated?
The second one.
Because regulation is not about stillness. It is about congruence.
When your internal state matches external reality, the nervous system releases effort.
That is why so many people say, “I try to stay present, but I cannot.”
What they really mean is, “I am trying to override my system instead of orienting it.”
Presence is not something you force. It is something that happens when the body updates its map.
Trauma makes this harder because trauma teaches the body that time is unreliable.
Past bleeds into now. Threat feels current even when it is not.
Stillness feels unsafe because vigilance once kept you alive.
So when someone says, “Just be present,” the nervous system hears,
“Drop your protection.”
And it says, no.
This is why techniques alone do not work.
Breathwork. Somatics. Mindset. Prayer. Performance tools.
They only work when they help the body answer one thing:
“I am here.”
“This is now.”
“This response fits this moment.”
That is orientation.
When orientation is restored, regulation happens as a side effect.
This is also why people can be in motion, in leadership, in pressure, in intensity, and still be regulated.
Because they are not fighting reality. They are responding to it (versus reacting to it...there's a difference).
They are not trying to feel a certain way. They are letting their nervous system tell the truth.
Here is the simplest way to practice this:
When something activates you, do not ask,
“How do I calm down?”
Ask, “What is actually happening right now?”
Not what might happen. Not what happened before. Not what you fear.
What is happening now?
Then notice if your response matches this moment or another one.
That single question brings the body back into time.
And when the body knows where it is, it knows what to do next.
That is regulation. That is presence. That is orientation.
So if you have spent years trying to fix yourself, calm yourself, heal yourself, or think your way into peace, hear this clearly.
If this landed for you, do not rush past it. Sit with the question again today, gently.
Where am I in relation to life right now?
And if you are ready to go deeper into this work as lived recalibration, this is exactly what I do with my clients.
You can learn more at thehighlevellife.com, or if something in you knows it is time to talk, you can schedule a private call with me here:
https://calendly.com/jenguidry/intro-zoom-or-phone-call-with-jen-guidry
No pressure. No fixing. Just orientation.
Because once the body knows where it stands, the rest follows.
Cheers,
Jen